


The Party Scene (What's Going On??)

by benDghey (Jahgyong)



Category: All Time Low (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Confessions, Fluff, Gen, One-sided pining, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Party, Underage Drinking, Underage Drug Use, alternating pov
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-03
Updated: 2018-07-06
Packaged: 2019-05-16 04:53:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 12,998
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14804732
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jahgyong/pseuds/benDghey
Summary: It never hurts to keep being a good kid, but when senioritis strikes, trying something new isn't a bad idea, at all.AKA the cliche "Good-students-want-to-try-new-experiences-before-graduating" trope in which Alex and Rian, who are on honour roll and well-liked by their teachers, join party-animal, wild boy Jack and quiet, unassuming Zack for a night that they'll never forget.





	1. To Live and Let Go

“Here.” Alex held out some bills Jack’s way, hoping that they wouldn’t get caught.

“Thanks,” Jack smiled widely.

Third period drug trade in front of Jack’s psychology classroom? Nah. Paying Jack for some sexual services to be carried out later after school? Nope. Something else that both of them shouldn’t be doing? Yes.

“Alright, what’ll your poison be, then?” Jack asked with a wink, pocketing the cash that he’d just received.

Alex glanced to the right. The classroom was still teacherless. “I don’t know. You pick for me.”

“You a fruity kinda guy?” Jack questioned, leaning forward to stick his face inches away from Alex’s.

Alex shrugged. “Don’t know.”

“Do you want something stronger?” Jack tipped his head to one side, still not using his indoor voice, to Alex’s dismay. At this rate, the fun would end before it even began.

“I don’t know, just pick something you think I’d like,” Alex said hastily, shaking his head.

Pushing limits as always, Jack reached out to gently shake Alex by his shoulders, having no regards to the random students sitting in the classroom watching them through the window. “Alex, buddy, you’re making this hard,” Jack whined.

“Jack, just pick something,” Alex struggled to keep irritation out of his voice. Jack was his best friend… but he was also a fucking diva too sometimes. Out of all the times that he could act up, he was doing so _right now_ in front of his own classroom. “The bell’s gonna go off in a minute,” Alex added, scanning their surroundings quickly. Deserted hallway, nearly-full classroom, still no teacher. “You probably shouldn’t get any more lates.”

“Why? I’m not at 30 yet,” Jack protested, thankfully dropping his hands from Alex’s shoulders; Alex noted that he was still awkwardly blocking the doorway, though.

“You shouldn’t even get to 30 or you’ll get kicked out,” Alex reminded him, backing away an inch or two. A hint.

“You have a spare, man,” Jack frowned. “Why are _you_ so worried?” But with that, he sidestepped so he was now in the doorway. “Anyway, I’ll talk to you later!” he said with a grin and a wave. “I’ll text you what I got for you!”

Alex held in a groan. Here Jack was, standing with one foot in the classroom and one still in the hallway, yelling at this inappropriate time. Of course, Alex was fond of his eccentric pal, but at the same time, Jack also deserved the punishments that teachers frequently doled out to him. But, hey, who was he without Jack?

“Alright, see ya, man,” he said, waving back. _Fucking finally._ He would hate to see Jack receive a late mark on his attendance today because of _him._ However, three steps forward, a hand grabbed his shoulder, halting him. Jack’s voice whispered in his ear:

“Loosen up, my dude. We’re gonna go all-out tonight. You, me, Zack, and Rian. Flyzik, Nano, and Vinny too if they’re coming. Drop the goody-two-shoes act. Tonight, we’re gonna get you _fucked up_.”

Suddenly, the shrill trill of the bell sounded and Jack was gone; Alex watched him weave through an aisle between desks as he made his way over to his own seat-- which was near the teacher’s desk, not that Alex was surprised.

Jack’s parting words replayed in his mind as he set off down the hallway. Was he actually ready for this? Was he really going to do this? Fuck yes.

***

Alex Gaskarth was, for the most part, a good kid. Although he had bratty tendencies at home once in a while (as do many teenagers), these were generally overlooked as he was respectful to his parents, did his best around the house, and never purposely searched for trouble. Until today. He was a good student, too. Not at the top of the class, but he was still decently smart and usually finished his schoolwork on time. Although he was seen by plenty of his fellow peers as “that weird emo kid”, he typically stayed in his lane so being bullied wasn’t _that much_ of a frequent occurance to him. The keywords here: _typically_ and _that much._ Sometimes Jack got him going so he wouldn’t shut up. And bullies existed at every school. Although it never hurt to keep being a good kid, Alex was starting to get bored of this lifestyle. It was senior year; did he honestly want to graduate without trying something new? Nah.

He absently stirred his soup while waiting for Jack’s text. He’d told his mother at the last minute that he’d be spending the night at Rian’s at first, only to change his mind and spit out the truth because screw it; he wouldn’t be a teenager forever. His mom hadn’t been that pleased with his announcement, but had reluctantly allowed him to go because she knew that, in the end, she couldn’t stop him. She’d just given him the stereotypical _please stay responsible and don’t get too carried away_ speech and had fixed him a bowl of soup for dinner before hurrying away to run some errands. Although Alex had never been to a party before, even he knew that getting drunk happened much faster on an empty stomach. Alex wasn’t going there to merely stand around and watch.

He suddenly saw his phone light up with a new notification. Abandoning the soup, he snatched his phone off the table. As predicted, he had one new message from Jack. Alex almost breathed a sigh of relief; Jack hadn’t ditched him. He’d begun thinking that either Jack had forgotten about his “order” or about texting him altogether. Smirking slightly, he opened the message, wondering what kind of “poison” his buddy had chosen for him. Unfortunately, he didn’t see the words that he was expecting:

_Im here :D_

Here??? What the fuck??? Already??? Drawing his brows together in confusion, Alex rose from the table and strode to the front door, swinging it open. He was then hit with a surprise-- again.

It was idling on the street in front of his house. It was an old Honda Civic. It was Zack who was sitting in the passenger seat. It was… Jack driving.

Alex had to close his eyes for a moment. _Fuuuuuck._ Things really were going to end before starting, after all. His eyes flew open when he heard the yell:

“Alex! Come on! Get in!”

Making a face, he stepped out of his house and, after ensuring that the door was locked so he wouldn’t get in any more shit than he already would be once he returned home, crossed over to Jack’s car. Zack’s window was rolled down, presumably so Jack could call out to him.

“Hey, what the fuck?” Alex said, leaning down so he could stare at the duo in the car. Yes, the duo because Rian somehow wasn’t in the car with them although the four of them had agreed to go together. “I thought Zack would be driving…” He wound up answering his own question after taking one look at Zack’s face. Being on honour roll wasn’t required to figure out that Zack was higher than his school grades at the moment. Zack stared back, his eyes blanker than the group assignment paper that he, Alex, and Rian were assigned last week in English class.

“His car didn’t want to cooperate,” Jack explained as Alex stepped back, shaking his head. “I had to give him a ride to school this morning.”

“I’m surprised you guys are still alive,” Alex remarked, opening the back door. He couldn’t decide which was worse: Jack’s lie or Jack’s driving.

“Hey, fuck you,” Jack said, peering at Alex over his shoulder and flipping the other off. “I don’t drive _that_ bad.”

“You almost hit a tree that-” Alex cut off when he caught sight of the large box hogging nearly the entire backseat. Said-box also provided an answer as to why Rian wasn’t with them. “What the fuck is _this_?” he said more to himself than Jack, pushing the whatever-it-was.

“A tent,” Jack replied, craning his head back to observe Alex’s actions. “We’re staying the night there. I don’t know about you.”

“Can’t you put that shit in the trunk?” Alex glowered at him.

Jack shrugged. “There’s no room.”

“Then where do I sit?”

“Beside it.” Jack pointed with his thumb.

“Jack, I’m not small enough to fit beside it,” Alex retorted.

“Aww, that’s too bad, baby,” Jack said sarcastically, turning up the radio. Of course, it was his Blink-182 mixtape.

“We can switch,” Zack suddenly offered from up front.

“If he can’t, _you_ can’t,” Jack said before Alex could answer. “Let Alex figure it out himself. He’s a smart boy.” He shot Alex a wink.

“ _Fuck you._ ” Alex shoved his middle finger in Jack’s face as he climbed into the car, his foot hitting something in the process. Glancing down, he recognized Jack’s sneaker, one of many that the boy owned. Jack had more shoes than common sense.

Unable to help himself, Jack smirked in amusement and licked Alex’s finger. Zack eyed them nonchalantly. Startled but unsurprised, Alex drew his hand back, shaking it out before cuffing Jack’s head.

“Don’t be mean, Alex,” Jack said in an exaggerated whiny tone, glancing at his friend through the rearview mirror.

“Why didn’t you guys tell me you were going to wear bandanas?” Alex changed the subject as he finally managed to squeeze himself into the sliver of space between the box and door. “I would’ve worn mine, too.” This was going to be an uncomfortable ride; he contemplated on accepting Zack’s offer to switch seats as Jack pulled away from the curb. However, the crinkling of an empty chip bag persuaded Alex to change his mind. Being cramped was on par with his feet being attacked by a mountain of discarded chip bags and other random garbage. There was no way to be comfortable in Jack’s car.

“It was actually a coincidence,” Zack replied, watching Alex adjust his position via the side mirror.

“Yeah,” Jack added. “I’m probably gonna get rid of mine later, though.”

“Hope Rian’s not matching with you guys.” Alex squirmed in a hopeless attempt to find a more-bearable position, his knees knocking against the back of Zack’s seat.  “Where is he anyway? _In_ the box?”

“Yeah, ‘cause he’s more flexible than _you_ ,” Jack snickered.

“Something came up,” Zack said, ignoring Jack. “He’ll come later.”

The trio then lapsed into silence, letting Jack’s CD do the talking. Zack was slightly concerned about how fast Jack was driving through this residential area, but chose to stay quiet and hoped that Jack would eventually slow down on his own. Alex rested his head against the window, his arm beginning to feel stiff from being pressed against that damn box. In Alex’s opinion, the backseat was as fine a sleeping quarters as a tent was; why was Jack so extra? Alex doubted that anybody else would be bringing a whole tent.

“Hey,” Zack piped up, ending the silence.

“Yeah?” Alex lifted his head from the window.

“Four-way up ahead.”

Zack was right; they were nearing a certain intersection that had a bad reputation for attracting asshole drivers. From those who forgot to turn their signal on to fuckers who felt entitled to go first regardless of if they reached the intersection last, Alex had seen it all. Unfortunately, Jack didn’t seem to notice that they were approaching this notorious four-way. He continued headbanging and singing along to his mixtape, oblivious to Zack’s warning.

Alex tried, seeing trees and houses blur by: “Jack?”

Jack still didn’t slow down.

“What?” Jack said loudly. Zack reached over to turn the volume down. Alex saw it in the distance.

There was another car.

“The intersection!” Alex shouted, unable to take his eyes off the other car, his heart fluttering.

They were close.

“The… oh shit!” Jack stomped on the brake, but Alex and Zack both knew and braced themselves.

Skidding noises.

Fuck.


	2. Memories That Fade Like Photographs

Although Alex had never thought much about his own death before, he _was_ certain though that this wasn’t how he’d wished to die. Meeting his demise in a cluttered car with one friend who was about to experience the end singing along to Blink-182 and another who was going to die stoned… this type of shit only happened in cliche movies, right? What’s My Age Again? had never been the song that he wanted playing at his death.

He kept his eyes squeezed shut, gripping Zack’s seat tightly as he waited for the darkness. However, he didn’t feel anything. He immediately opened his eyes, wondering if Zack had somehow stopped the other car from T-boning them. The guy had arms bigger than Alex’s career aspirations; Zack couldn’t be working out all the time for nothing. Alex swivelled his head to see what was happening, his heart still frantically racing and his hands clammy. There was the other car, no further than five inches away from them. The driver, a middle-aged man with a thinning hairline and a nasty glare on his face, was yelling. He honked his horn as he sent some nice combinations of swear words toward Zack, who just stared at him. Jack leapt into action then, cranking the wheel sharply with a painful squeal of his tires. This sound was going to give Alex some bad fucking memories for the next little while.

“Jack,” he said, unable to remove his gaze from the other car as they turned left.

“I’m so scared!” Jack burst out, checking the rearview mirror. “What if he follows us? What if he calls the cops on us?”

“He probably saw your plate,” Zack replied, shifting in his seat so he could peer back. He made awkward eye contact with Alex, who couldn’t believe how calm Zack sounded. “Maybe you should pull over.”

“No!” Jack shook his head furiously, making a sudden stop as they encountered a red light. Alex _really_ didn’t want Jack driving anymore. “I wanna call my mom,” Jack said, fright breaking his voice.

Alex had never seen Jack this terrified before. Jack had always been great at hiding fear, probably because he didn’t want to be called a _pansy_ by their classmates. Alex wanted to reach over and give Jack a pat on the shoulder; however, he was pinned in place by the box and the seat that Zack refused to move forward even by just a couple of inches. He settled for words instead, hoping that his voice was as calm as Zack’s had been earlier: “Hey, Jack? It’ll be alright. Don’t worry.” Wow, who was the _real_ shitty liar here? “I can take over.”

“Or I can,” Zack added.

“Aren’t you high?” Alex questioned, narrowing his eyes as Jack pointlessly turned onto another random street.

“..no?” The surprise in Zack’s tone matched the surprise that Alex now felt. Whoops.

“Then why do you look so baked?” Nice, Alex had just made a damned fool out of himself and was desperate to cover up his embarrassment. “And how are you so fucking calm after all that?”

“I’ll tell you later.”

“Guys, do you think he’s still following me?” Jack interjected, glancing at his rearview mirror for, Alex had observed, the _n_ th time since they’d nearly gotten into that accident. “Do you think we lost him?”

“Jack, just pull over and let me or Zack drive,” Alex said firmly. He was no longer that shaken up; he had collected himself enough to reason that he could drive decently.

“You guys don’t even know where you’re going.” A feeble attempt at a jab, but Alex was relieved; Jack was recovering, at least.

“Apparently, neither do you,” Alex shot back as he noticed, in the distance, a familiar stop sign that he had hoped not to see again until tomorrow. “Why the fuck are we back here?”

“I want to see if he’s still there.”

“Jack, just fucking pull over and let me or Zack drive!” Alex snapped, anxiety kicking in as they neared the four-way of death. Two meetings with this intersection in one night? No. Alex didn’t want to take that. Unfortunately, he was ignored as Jack gently slowed to a stop at the sign. Okay, so _now_ he was paying attention?? Fortunately, that other car was gone. Jack took a left turn, leading Alex to believe that they weren’t going to the party anymore. So he asked, “Dude, where are we going?”

“My house,” Jack said flatly.

“Oh.” Alex didn’t know what else to say. He was rather bummed out, but at the same time, he couldn’t blame Jack. That had been a horrifying experience; Alex assumed that Zack probably wasn’t in the mood to party anymore, either. And whether Rian was actually coming was a mystery. Speaking of Rian… Alex leaned back in his seat, thinking that Rian was smart for not catching a ride with them and that perhaps Rian was a psychic who foresaw that near-collision.

“It’s cancelled anyway right now,” Zack said, glancing up from his phone. “Police found out about the location.”

“We partying at Jack’s house, then?” Alex tried to joke, although disappointment leaked into his voice. He couldn’t help it; he had been super excited about attending his first party, about having fun with his friends, about experiencing a memorable night.

“Let’s just wait for a bit,” Zack answered, dropping his gaze back to his screen. “They’re trying to figure out a new location.”

Alex leaned his head against the window, no longer caring about the box invading his personal space. As long as there were no more close calls, he couldn’t give a damn about the box’s presence anymore. “Alright.”

“Tell them to try by that one diner thingy that’s just out of town,” Jack said suddenly.

“Who has a party by a diner?” Alex shot his friend a strange look despite knowing that Jack wouldn’t see it, that Jack _shouldn’t_ be seeing it if he wished to avoid being a road hazard again.

“Wherever works,” Jack shrugged.

“Nah, police are there too,” Zack said quickly, scrolling through his messages. “I think they’re gonna have to actually cancel it.”

“I think the fuck not,” said Jack, frowning. “If they never cancelled it all these other years, why would they cancel it _now_?”

“So.. the police _know_ about this party?” Alex asked, eyeing Jack because what else was there to look at other than the scenery whizzing by? “Did somebody snitch?”

“It happens every year around this time. They’re not dumb,” Zack responded.

“Well, fuck.” Alex had nothing to say to that.

“Yeah.”

The trio drove in silence for a while; Jack didn’t turn on the radio this time. Alex was fine with it being quiet because he’d rather Jack focus on driving. Finally, they reached Jack’s neighbourhood. Alex couldn’t wait to get out of the car and stretch out. Fuck that tent-box.

“Maybe we should go in your house and do some homework while we wait,” he said sarcastically as Jack pulled up by his house.

“No, I told my parents I’m going camping with you guys,” Jack shook his head, parking in front of a stranger’s home two houses away.

“Are your parents even home?” The window had a foggy area from his breathing; had Jack not been distressed from that incident earlier, Alex would have drawn a dick on it. “Just tell them you forgot something.”

“I don’t think it’d make sense for him to say that if we’re going in with him,” Zack said as Jack shut off the ignition.

“Yeah, _Alex_ ,” Jack threw a lighthearted glower in Alex’s direction. “I thought you were the smart one here.”

“Fuck off, I was just trying to help.” Deeming Jack as being back to normal, Alex hastily traced a cock on the foggy patch with his finger, unaware that Jack was still watching him. It wasn’t like Jack had any more value to lose with this car.

“Quit drawing dicks on the window!” Jack shouted. Beside him, Zack smirked. He enjoyed their playful banters… although he’d never admit this out loud.

“Thought you liked decor on your car.” Alex let his hand drop.

“Well, I’m gonna draw a big cock on _your_ window next time I’m in your car,” Jack retorted, moving his focus to his phone. “I wonder where Rian is.”

Silence enveloped them once more for several minutes. Alex pondered about what would happen at the party-- assuming that it wouldn’t have to be cancelled. Were Flyzik and all them even coming? What kind of drunk would he be? In front of him, Zack went on reading messages on his phone. Beside Zack, Jack also had his phone in hand… but he wasn’t actively using it. Although Alex and Zack were fooled into believing that Jack was texting Rian, the usually-energetic teen was actually lost in his thoughts, his eyes on the screen but not seeing anything, a pang in his heart. Fully recovered from his shock now, he let himself consider all the things that would’ve occured and wouldn’t be occuring anymore had they really been hit at that intersection:

Zack came to mind first. Zack, who would have died immediately. No more Zack meant no more late-night drives to the park to chill under the stars, and subsequent stops at McDonald’s afterwards for fries and pop (Both Alex’s and Rian’s parents would never allow them to go on a midnight Mcdank’s run). No more fucking around in photography class together and abusing the zoom function on DSLR’s to take shots of people’s nosehairs. No more attentive ear to listen to him rant about his problems; Rian and Alex were sometimes askholes who asked Jack what was wrong, then almost always began their reply with “You shouldn’t have…”.

Thoughts of Zack melted into thoughts of Rian next. Oh, all the things that Rian wouldn’t have in his life any longer if the three of them had been killed tonight. There would be no one yelling his name at his band concerts even though the audience was supposed to be quiet. There would be no one to sweet-talk his mom into baking extra brownies and other treats at after-school hangout sessions. There would be no one for him to lecture like the dad friend he was.

Jack then thought about his family, about how disappointed his parents would be and how heartbroken all of them would be. His siblings wouldn’t have anyone to baby nor someone who would tease them. His parents wouldn’t have anyone keeping them company in the kitchen while they cooked; nobody would stand behind them at the stove and peer over their shoulders to see what was in the pan and remind them that their cooking was amazing. They didn’t need that pain. And because he wanted to stop thinking about his family, because it hurt too much, he turned his inner turmoil to Alex.

There was something about Alex that made Jack feel… different. Love, perhaps, he’d reluctantly admit. Sure, he loved all his friends, but he especially had a soft spot for Alex. There were so many activities that he enjoyed doing with the other boy: playing their guitars together after school, having long phone calls on weekends to talk about a show that they were both watching at the same time but at their own houses, and even stupid shit like bitching about certain classes while they were sitting in said-classes. If Alex had died… none of this would happen anymore. Jack didn’t want that, not when he had so many things that he had planned to do and say… like maybe confess to Alex someday about his love for the other. A dumb fucking idea because Alex gave this one girl Lisa “the eyes” all the time in biology class, but hey, it never hurt to try. Lisa was a great girl and Alex deserved happiness; even if it wasn’t with him but with Lisa, Jack would be fine with it. As long as Alex was happy, everything would be fricking fantastic.

Jack couldn’t tell whether his head or heart was hurting more. Luckily, having had enough of the stillness in the car, Alex decided to break the silence:

“Now what?”

“We have to wait,” Zack mumbled.

And, because he felt like a shitty friend, Jack said it, “Hey, guys, I’m really sorry.”

“About what?” Alex could predict what Jack was going to say: _I don’t feel like going anymore. Do you guys wanna go in to my house or go back to your own houses?_

“I could’ve killed you guys,” Jack lowered his voice.

“It’s fine. Shit happens,” said Zack with a yawn.

Alex nodded. “Yeah, don’t worry about it.”

“I feel bad. If Rian was driving, I don’t think it would’ve happened,” Jack went on.

Alex stopped resting his face against the window and awkwardly reached over (awkwardly, because the box began digging into his side as he did so) to pat Jack’s arm. “Yeah, but what if Rian stopped on time but that other guy didn’t? Shit still would’ve happened.”

“Good point.” Alex’s comforting words were akin to a shard of glass stabbing Jack’s heart. _This_ was why he had fallen so balls-deep in love with the guy; Alex was just too nice. He forced himself to quit thinking about that almost-accident and Alex because pretty soon, the other two would realize that Jack wasn’t being his usual carefree self, and then they would start asking questions. His phone had entered sleep mode while he’d been reminiscing; Jack woke it up and checked his inbox in an attempt to get his shit back together. They had a big party to (hopefully) go to, and a wild party required fun Jack.

“Maybe we should just have our own party here,” Alex suggested, propping his elbow on the box. Hey, free armrest, right? He didn’t argue with his mom for 20 minutes earlier in the day for him to come straight back home.

“Might as well,” Jack opened his door. “They’re too busy fighting about pallets and shit and not talking about the location.”

“What about Rian?” Zack asked, side-eyeing Jack.

“Not our fault he’s at band.” Jack swung his feet out of the car. “Zack, do you want your drink too?”

“Not right now,” Zack returned to his never-ending notifications. He suddenly regretted enabling notifications from the party-planning group chat that he’d joined solely to lurk.

“Hey, you never told me what you got for me,” Alex told Jack, watching as his friend got out of the car and headed around to the trunk. He didn’t take his eyes off Jack as the other returned with two glass bottles-- one orange and one clear. Alex squinted at the colourless bottle; knowing Jack and his impish tendencies, Alex couldn’t help but suspect that Jack had filled that bottle with plain tap water just to fuck around with him.

“It’s a cooler,” Jack said, handing Alex the orange bottle. “My brother picked it out for you.”

“Why did your brother pick out my drink?” Alex studied the _cooler_. Orange-flavoured, as if that was a surprise. 4% alcohol… Alex sure wasn’t gonna get wasted that quickly here unless he downed the whole thing really fast.

“‘Cause I’m not old enough to go in the liquor store, _duh_. Come on.” Jack rolled his eyes, removing the cap off his bottle.

“What do _you_ have?” Alex gestured to Jack’s drink. “Vodka?”

“Hell yeah.”

“Well, cheers,” Alex said, opening his drink.

“Yeah! To escaping that accident and Rian’s band practice!” Jack said, pulling out a package of peach rings from somewhere in the car that it shouldn’t have been. Alex made a face; because it was Jack, those peach rings had probably been sitting there for months. His eyes widened as Jack ripped open the packaging and plopped a couple of rings into his bottle. Zack echoed precisely what Alex was thinking:

“Umm… what the fuck?”

“Hey, the more flavour, the better,” Jack raised the bottle. “Anyone wanna try?”

“Yeah,” Alex held out his hand, curiosity having killed his disbelief.

“It might be too strong for you,” Jack teased, passing him the “new concoction”. He loved “pissing off” Alex and seeing the boy’s face scrunch up in annoyance when he was poked fun at. Alex’s irritated expression was cute.

Alex gave him the finger before giving Jack’s drink a try. Jack stared at him expectantly. It was cold and tasted somewhat like apples at first before being replaced by the familiar strong aftertaste of alcohol. Alex was no stranger to the taste of alcohol; he’d snuck in sips of his dad’s beer before when his father hadn’t been looking. “It’s not bad,” he declared, making Zack turn around in his seat and Jack grin. He took another swig before giving it to Zack.

“It’s alright,” Zack agreed a moment later as the bottle wound up in Jack’s hand again.

“I’m a genius, guys!” Jack announced. 

Alex shook his head, smiling slightly. He then caught sight of Zack angling a camera Jack’s way. A few seconds later, the camera was facing him instead. He furrowed his brows as Zack pressed the button. “Zack, what the fuck?”

“Doing it for the memories,” Zack chuckled.

“Hey, let’s take selfies!” Jack shook Zack’s arm. “Alex, get over here!”

“How?” Alex asked as his body answered his own question; he found his knee on top of the box as he leaned forward to stick his head between Jack and Zack, his arms resting behind their headrests. Now he was sure that if they ever played Twister, he’d win.

“Okay.” Zack moved his head closer to Alex’s, holding his arm out and hoping that nobody would be cut off. Jack mimicked him, resting his cheek against Alex’s hair… which was soft and smelled pleasantly fragrant. Simultaneously wondering what kind of shampoo his friend used and whether Alex would notice, he sniffed Alex’s hair. Fortunately for him, Alex was too occupied with trying to maintain his awkward position to notice that Jack was smelling his hair.

They took several selfies, making funny faces and random hand signs, stopping just as Alex was about to beg for them to end it. He didn’t think his body could handle anymore Twister-esque poses. Jack began advising Zack on which photos to delete:

“I’m blinking in this one… can we get rid of it?”

“That one’s blurry as fuck. We should get rid of that, too.”

“Ohh, I like how I look in this one even though Alex looks high.”

Alex continued eavesdropping as he finally gave his own drink a shot. It was… exactly as he’d expected. Not anything spectacular, and definitely weaker than vodka. But Jack had tried and he wasn’t going to let it go to waste.

“Hey, don’t get _too_ crazy,” Jack said, glancing at him; any excuse to steal a peek at Alex. “I don’t want you puking in my car.”

“You know what’d be funny?” Alex took another swig. “If we got high too.”

Almost immediately, he heard Zack’s distinct nervous laughter.

“Guess Zack agrees,” Alex shrugged, set on downing half the bottle in the next two minutes when Zack said softly:

“Do you _want_ to get high?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thanks so much for reading! It means a lot to me <3 see you all in the next chapter!


	3. Drugs & Candy

Alex couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He couldn’t be _that_ drunk yet. Obviously, Jack felt the same way as he did a double-take from up front. Alex leaned forward, wondering if Zack was joking.

“Zack, what?”

“Do you guys.. uh.. want to get high?” Zack asked, sounding almost sheepish. As if attempting to hide his embarrassment, he began shuffling through his knapsack and faked being occupied with finding something.

Alex exchanged glances with Jack, who pointed to Zack’s lap a moment later. Alex craned his head, cursing Jack’s stupid tent box because he too wanted to see what was in Zack’s lap but didn’t feel like busting out Twister poses again. 

“Dude, that’s a--” Jack was cut off by Zack:

“Yeah.”

“A what?” Alex desperately tried to see over Zack’s shoulder, but was only able to distinguish a bag.

“Do you guys want to get high or..?” Zack nervously laughed again.

“Fuck yeah, I do,” Jack pumped his fist before peering at Alex, who still couldn’t tell what was going on in Zack’s lap. “Let’s let Alex go first if he still wants to.”

“Of course I do,” Alex said, and it hit him: it was probably a bong.

“‘Kay.” was all Zack said, and the gentle unzipping of a sandwich bag being opened could be heard next.

Jack stuck his face close to Zack’s lap, eyes large. “Ohh, Zacky!”

Alex really wanted to watch what Zack was doing too; fuck that shitty box. Irritated, he slammed his palm on the back of Zack’s seat.

“Okay, so-” Zack began, ignoring Alex, but was interrupted by Jack this time:

“Can you guys go do that outside?” Jack straightened up, shooting a quick glance in Alex’s direction. “I don’t want the smell of it in my car.”

“Fair,” said Zack, leaving the car.

“It’s already a mess in here, though,” Alex pointed out, opening his door and feeling some sort of excitement hit him. Shit was finally starting to get real.

“Yeah, but I don’t know if somebody in my family might need to use my car or something,” Jack explained, eyeing him.

“Okay, makes sense,” Alex said, leaving it at that because he couldn’t wait to be outside. He then slid out of Jack’s car, stretching his stiff legs as he eagerly joined Zack on the sidewalk.  Zack, who was holding a pipe in one hand. Alex blinked.

“Dude, that yours?”

Zack smiled slightly. “Nah. It’s Vinny’s.”

Alex wasn’t a stoner, but even he knew some things. “That shit’s expensive. Why would Vinny just give it to you?”

“He told me to hold onto it until we got there.” Zack dropped his tone: “Did you still want to know… why I was calm earlier?”

Alex followed his gaze to where Jack was still in the car, snacking on those peach rings from _x_ months ago that he probably shouldn’t be eating and presumably texting Rian because that band practice excuse was becoming a bit too much. To be honest, he’d momentarily forgotten about that near-accident. “Sure.”

“We almost got into another accident on the way to your house,” Zack said, still keeping his voice low but shifting his stare back to Alex. “That’s why. He almost switched lanes into a truck.”

“Oh.” Alex wasn’t that shocked. Obviously, Zack had seen too much shit within a three-hour timespan. He was, however, more surprised about the fact that he’d never known about Zack getting baked before until tonight. A random memory came to his mind then, making sense now:

Alex had invited some of his buddies over last month to hang out, but had wound up “encouraging” them to watch a documentary on outer space half an hour in that only he and Rian (vaguely) had been interested in. Ok, Rian had been a good sport; he had at least _pretended_ to have been engaged in the show and had even asked Alex questions. Jack had never tried altogether, only laying on the floor by their feet, underneath the coffee table, and had batted at their legs and played games on his phone until he’d eventually fallen asleep. Zack and Vinny had stared at the screen intently the entire time, seeming as though they’d ascended into a different dimension themselves. Back then, Alex had just thought that they were enjoying the program. Now he knew that they had been high as fuck that day.

The memory scattered when Alex noticed Zack drawing a lighter out of his pocket. “Let me guess… that’s Vinny’s, too.” He couldn’t help himself; was Zack really pulling that bs?

“Yep.” Zack didn’t make eye contact with him, feigning interest in Jack’s tire instead.

“Zack, just admit that you get stoned,” Alex shook his head. “Quit putting the blame on Vinny.”

“I’ve only gotten high twice,” Zack raised the pipe to his lips.

“With Vinny and once was when you guys came over to my house,” Alex said, focusing on his oft-reserved friend. Senioritis was striking all of his friends, it seemed, not just him.

“Yup. I’ll go first so you can see it,” Zack said, and Alex instantly shut up because he wanted to observe.

He kept his focus on Zack as the other flicked _Vinny_ ’s lighter, bringing it to the end of _Vinny’s_ pipe. His eyes widened as Zack breathed in, his mind wishing for Jack’s neighbour to not be home/care that there were two high school boys getting baked by their front yard. “It doesn’t smell,” Alex noted after Zack exhaled smoke.

“What doesn’t?”

“I thought weed smelled like skunk. Unless this isn’t weed,” Alex said, hoping that it was just pot and not something like shrooms because he wasn’t ready for anything beyond weed quite yet.

“It is. But there’s different kinds,” Zack informed, like he was some ganja guru all of a sudden after blazing it with Vinny twice.

“Oh.”

“You wanna try now?”

“Bring it.” This was it. Alex’s good student status ended here.

Zack took a step closer, passing Alex the pipe. Alex studied it in awe as Zack switched the lighter on again. Mimicking what Zack had done a couple of minutes ago, Alex held the pipe to his lips.

“Okay,” Zack said, hovering the lighter over the end of the pipe, “breathe in and--”

Alex cut him off by coughing. The smoke was everywhere in his lungs. Shortly after, Jack’s laughter echoed from inside the car.

“You took in too much at once,” Zack said, glancing at Jack, who had his face pressed against the window and was laughing and pointing at Alex.

After catching his breath, Alex glared at Jack, pounding on the window with his fist before turning his attention back to Zack. Jack flinched, but stayed where he was. “Can I try again?” So what if Alex goofed up? This was his first time; of course he wouldn’t be a pro.

Zack nodded, and they tried again. Jack continued watching the scene that was happening just outside his car, waiting for Alex to fuck up again. However, Alex didn’t mess up this time. He knew better than to give Jack any more satisfaction. Zack had held up his finger this time as a signal to stop.

“There you go,” he said as Alex blew out.

“Hit me up again,” Alex said as the passenger side door was opened from the inside. There was a weird taste in his mouth now; however, he was determined to keep taking hits until he noticeably felt different.

Both Zack and Alex side-eyed Jack, who could have come out through his own door but had instead chosen to stick his head and torso outside while the lower half of his body remained trapped inside the car.

“Uh… this is actually Vinny’s-” Zack started, but Jack spoke over him:

“Who cares, he probably has more to spare. It’s his fault for leaving his weed with us.”

“Um…” Zack said, but his hands betrayed his conscience, lighting up the pipe for Alex again.

Jack couldn’t take it anymore; he wanted to get high, too. He slid back into the car, shutting that door and opening his own door instead. He raced around the front of the car and stopped by his friends’ side as Alex exhaled. “Zack, Zack, me too.”

Zack began looking like the time they had a pop quiz in English class last year. However, the other two didn’t notice.

“Can I again?” Alex asked, because he _still_ didn’t feel any different.

“You had your turn,” Jack told him, frowning. “Zack, can I have a turn? I don’t think Rian wants to try, so let’s just use it all up.”

“Hope this doesn’t look too suspicious,” Zack said, giving up on being subtle.

“Yeah… Alex, go back in the car,” Jack said after pausing for a moment.

Alex blinked. “Why?”

“‘Cause Zack said we look too suspicious,” Jack lightly shoved Alex closer to the car.

“Okay.” And Alex returned to the back, beside the box for some reason, although he could’ve easily taken Zack’s seat for the time being. Reuniting with his abandoned Breezer, he rolled down the window slightly to watch the view of J/Zack smoking up while he enjoyed his drink.

“I don’t think you need a demo,” Zack was saying.

“I want to see,” Jack insisted. “And you can’t get high from one puff, come on, man.”

“Guess we’ll have to--”

Jack beat him to it, opening the passenger side door again but this time from outside. “Hi, Alex,” he said cheerily, retrieving Zack’s knapsack from where it lay on the seat. He was out of the car before Alex could reply.

Even though Alex’s eyes were fixed on his buddies outside, his mind was wandering: he wondered if Jack would choke too like he had, what his friend Lisa was doing right now, if Rian had bailed on them, whether Vinny would be mad or proud that they used up his stash. To answer one question, Jack didn’t cough, sucking in like he’d done it before. Which, Alex guessed, Jack had, whatwith the amount of parties he’d been to throughout his high school career.

Alex continued staring blankly, occasionally taking a swig of his drink until Zack called it quits, storing Vinny’s pipe in his bag.

“I’m gonna go on a walk,” Zack said suddenly, hoisting his bag over his shoulder and hoping that the other two wouldn’t offer to tag along. Luckily, they didn’t.

“Have a good walk!” Jack clapped Zack’s back before climbing into the car, stealing the other’s seat.

“Bye,” Alex called, snapping out of his thoughts. “Don’t get lost!”

Zack gave them a wave, then set off. Inside the car, Jack and Alex sat in silence for the longest while. Alex forced himself to stop looking at a tree in someone’s yard after a few minutes had passed, instead settling his eyes on Jack in the side-mirror. Jack, who almost immediately made eye contact with him in the mirror and shot him a small smile.

“Wanna go outside?” Jack asked, taking off his bandana and replacing it with a snapback that Alex assumed had been lying around on the floor and had accidentally been stepped on by Zack.

“Why?” Jack was really staring at him a lot today.

“‘Cause it’s hot in here,” Jack replied, opening the door without waiting to hear Alex’s response.

“Just turn on the AC,” Alex told him even though he began leaving the car as well. It was too cramped and growing hot. Alex wanted fresh air.

“I don’t wanna pay for it,” Jack said, joining Alex outside. “Wait,” he moved behind Alex, who wanted to question why Jack was still holding the bandana in one hand. If that idiot was tempted to tie that bandana over his cap…

“Jack?”

“How do you get your hair so soft?” Jack ran his fingers through Alex’s hair, sneaking in another sniff.

“M-My straightener?” What in the fuck was going on?? Why was Jack playing with his hair in the middle of the street? He reached behind to knock Jack’s hand away. “Jack, what the fuck are you doing?”

“You wanted a bandana, now you get one,” Jack said, hastily tying his bandana around Alex’s head. RIP Alex’s nicely-straightened hair.

Alex fought back a smile. Of all things for Jack to remember, it was _this._ He turned back...only to discover that Jack was climbing on top of his car. Alex narrowed his eyes; how high was this guy already? “Get down from there,” he ordered, because Zack had been right and they probably _were_ suspicious.

Jack was sitting on top of the car, his feet resting on the trunk. “Come join,” he said, patting the space beside him.

Alex put his hands on his hips. “Get the fuck down from there. You’ll get in big shit.”

“Who fucking cares?” Jack shrugged. “Don’t be a goody two shoes. It feels nice up here… come join.”

“Jack, I don’t want us going to jail.”

“We won’t. Come join me,” Jack was begging now, but he didn’t care. He wanted, more like _needed_ , Alex to sit on top of his car with him. “Alex… please,” he added.

Alex shook his head, but was hauling himself up onto the hood mere seconds later because he was supposed to be dropping the “good kid” act. Jack held out a hand to help him up onto the roof. Now they were both sitting on top of Jack’s car with their backs pressed to each other. To Alex’s surprise, he was feeling as good as Jack had claimed he’d feel. He leaned against Jack, tilting his head up to stare at the sky. Jack was right for once.

And Jack? He’d never felt better. It was like they were on some fucked-up date. Alex was warm against him, as warm as his insides were currently. He had to thank Vinny’s weed and Zack ditching; sober Alex would have _never_ agreed to this. Whether or not it was due to him being under the influence, Jack felt braver all of a sudden. It was time to exceed some limits. Ignoring the nervousness flitting within his body, Jack reached his hand back to tap Alex’s.

“What?” Alex asked in response to this.

“You’re not scared you’ll fall off?” Jack couldn’t make things _too_ obvious, but he also had nothing clever to say to lead into what he wanted. Trying to pick up boys was a whole new experience than getting girls.

“As long as _you_ don’t push me off,” Alex replied. He was comfortable now. He was relaxed and enjoying the cool breeze on his face, absorbing the sight of houses lining the quiet street. Fuck what Jack’s neighbours would think if they saw this sight.

“I can hold your hand in case you _do_ fall,” Jack said, desperately hoping for Alex to just fucking get the hint and take the bait. His heart was near in his throat; he wasn’t sure if he could handle the suspense any longer.

“If I fell, the weight of my body would take you down with me if we were holding hands,” Alex told him matter-of-factly. “We’d both get seriously injured. At least if only one of us fell, the other could help.”

“Okay, you nerd.” Well, that was an epic fail. Jack racked his brain in an attempt to find another method for getting Alex to hold hands with him. Alex was obviously too baked for some smooth charm right now. Jack couldn’t talk him into it like he could with Rian’s mom when he wanted extra cookies. Perhaps being bold was the only choice. “Hold my hand,” he tried to say jokingly, but his voice and its shakiness failed him.

“What, why?” Alex whipped his head around, but Jack wasn’t looking his way.

The words began freely flowing out of Jack’s mouth before he could reconsider them, “‘Cause I got scared. That accident… you know? Comfort?” This wasn’t how he flirted with girls, but then again, all the chicks that he’d tried to ask out before also hadn’t been higher than Alex’s GPA, which was pretty damn high.

“Oh.” Alex said, Jack’s words finally hitting home. Jack had never been the best at asking for emotional support. Actually, none of his friends were. Empathetically, Alex linked his fingers with Jack’s.

Alex’s hand was cold, which did wonders with extinguishing the heat that had been building up in Jack’s face. “Thanks,” Jack murmured, giving his friend’s hand a squeeze. He quickly tacked on, “Rian’s on his way.” to diffuse the awkwardness of the situation. Rian _was_ coming, but Jack didn’t know the exact time when.

“Okay.” Alex paused for a moment, then decided that Jack needed a distraction from the near-collision flashbacks and so, kept talking, “I wish it was dark out so we can see the stars.”

Jack was already seeing stars, but Alex didn’t have to know that.

“If it’s clear out, we can see a lot of constellations. You at least know the basic ones, right? Like the Big Dipper, Little Dipper, Orion…”

Jack had no idea what the fuck was going on as Alex listed names of constellations or whatever that he didn’t know. What he _did_ know was that he enjoyed listening to Alex’s voice even if he couldn’t keep up with the conversation anymore. Jack no longer cared to go to the party; spending his night here, with Alex, holding hands, on top of his car, was much more pleasing than being crowded between 50 or more people out in the wilderness, watching Vinny do something stupid because drunk Vinny always guaranteed some next level bullshit. _This_ was what happiness felt like. Closing his eyes, Jack threw in some random “Uh-huh”’s and “Yeah”’s so Alex wouldn’t be talking to himself. The two were so lost in their own world that they failed to notice a car pull up on the opposite side of the street to them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will be a while cos: 1) it's long lol and 2) i have a final to study for. Pls wait for me and, as always, thanks for reading <3 take care in the meantime, everyone!!


	4. Damned If I Do Ya (Damned If I Don't)

It was about 6:45 P.M. when Rian Dawson finally arrived. Jack had mentioned that he and the others would be at his house. Putting his car in park, Rian then got out, spotting a familiar old Civic… and some other sight that he had never asked to see but was happening regardless. There was Jack… with Alex… both sitting not in, but on top of Jack’s car. Zack didn’t appear to be with them; Rian guessed that he was actually in Jack’s house like a normal fucking person.

Holding back a sigh, he crossed over to where his two friends were, all the while knowing that if 4+4=8, Jack and Alex were baked. There was no other explanation for why they were _on_ the car and not _in_ it. As he neared the duo, his belief solidified; Alex was babbling about… stars? it seemed like, while Jack was staring straight ahead and being uncharacteristically calm. The selling point: neither of them noticed Rian’s presence.

Rian was already disliking this. _Come on, dude, it’s senior year. You gotta loosen up and try something, at least,_ Jack had told him last week. Rian had been intent on refusing to come along to this party until he’d caught wind of Alex going. He’d reasoned that, since Alex was attending, it probably wouldn’t be some wild-ass rave. More like a bonfire, he’d thought. And he’d falsely assumed that Alex would be sober and that the two of them would have to run around looking after their other drunk friends. Unfortunately, Rian could now see how wrong he’d been. It was obviously about to become just _him_ taking care of his inebriated buddies (oh boy, Jack, as well as Vinny, were bound to be a fucking handful), _him_ being the DD, _him_ not drinking… Rian had been, well, set up.

Pushing down his irritation, he held his hand up in a wave. As much as he was pissed off with his friends right now, he wasn’t a dick. He’d at least say hi before ignoring them for the next little while. “Hey, guys.”

That voice… Rian! He’d actually come. Alex peered down at his pal, waving back. “Hey!”

Jack blinked, suddenly snapping back to reality at the new voice. He shifted his head to the side, making awkward eye contact with Rian. “Took you long enough,” he managed, his head still fuzzy from being serenaded with Alex’s astronomy lecture.

Rian shook his head, crossing his arms over his chest. “Why are you guys on top of the car?” he gestured. “And where’s Zack?”

“Went on a walk,” Alex shrugged.

It took all of Rian’s willpower to not take out his phone and send Zack a _Where are you?_ message because Zack had the right idea. However, the fact that there were two high boys sitting on top of a car needing supervision kept him in place.

“Come join us,” Alex said now, causing both Rian and Jack to turn to him in disbelief. Rian, because: 1) there was no more room on top of the car, and 2) he wasn’t about to sit on top of a car, anyway. That was just dumb. Jack, because he wanted Alex all to himself. He didn’t need Rian third-wheeling.

“I’ll pass.” Rian shook his head again. “When’s this gig even starting?”

“Uhh…” Alex tilted his head to one side. “It got cancelled for now. The police found out about it so now we have to wait for a new location.”

Rian secretly hoped that it would get permanently cancelled. Sure, he enjoyed hanging out with his friends, but not when all of them would be under the influence and expecting him to clean up their messes and take care of them.

“Where were you, anyway?” Alex asked abruptly.

Jack squeezed Alex’s hand more tightly. “Band.”

“At a band meeting, like Jack said. We were talking about band trip.” Rian moved around the car to stand on the sidewalk. “Why don’t we just go wait in Jack’s house… what the hell, are you guys _holding hands?_ ” Rian did a double-take.

“Yeah.” Jack giggled.

Alex knew that Rian was going to voice some concerns, so he quickly said, “We almost got into a really bad accident on the way here and Jack got scared.”

Rian frowned. “How bad was it that you have to hold his hand?” he inquired, although it was clear that they were probably holding hands because they were stoned and not due to some close call.

“We almost got T-boned, man.”

“Who was driving?” Again, Rian knew the answer, but the question was out of his mouth before he could stop it.

“Me!” Jack said, swinging Alex’s hand.

Rian resisted the urge to facepalm. “You guys _let_ him drive?”

“Look, I just wanted to get a ride, but he said something happened to Zack’s car,” Alex said defensively. “Ask Zack.”

The only thing Rian wanted to ask was where Zack exactly was, and also why they couldn’t just hang around at Jack’s house. “Can’t we wait in your house, Jack? You guys can’t be comfortable up there.”

“It’s nice up here,” Jack replied, leaning into Alex, who nodded in agreement. “You can wait in the car, if you want. It’s unlocked.” He pointed downward with his free hand.

“I’m good.” Rian had to turn him down; he was _not_ a fan of the inside of Jack’s car. “I’ll be waiting over in my car,” he flicked his thumb back. “Give me a shout if you guys need anything.”

Alex and Jack simultaneously shouted their goodbyes as Rian rushed back to his own car. Pretending that he wasn’t associated with the two idiots on the other side of the street but also keeping an eye on them, Rian reached over to grab a battered _Hamlet_ from the backpack sitting in the passenger seat. He might as well get a head start on the group paper that had been assigned last week while he waited. He no longer had the patience to wait for Zack’s last-minute contributions because Zack was always on island time and only felt compelled to start his schoolwork one day before the deadline. Three years of dealing with that bullshit was enough. If Zack was on island time, Jack had _no_ sense of time.The guy had a good sense of fashion though, throwing his spare money to flashy shoes and customizing his shirts. He’d gotten _Who The F*ck is Jack Barakat!?_ on one of his shirts; Rian thought that _What The F*ck Is A Homework!?_ would have been equally fitting. Luckily, Jack wasn’t in their English class. Alex, on the other hand, was never an issue in group projects. Although the dude himself would rather die than admit it and even went as far to never work on his assignments in class, Alex was a little goody two shoes who did all his work at home and never missed a due date. Rian could always count on Alex.

***

Zack Merrick stopped walking, feeling the gentle breeze ruffle his hair. It was the perfect evening for a stroll and taking pictures of his surroundings. He’d come far from Jack’s car and had snapped photos of many things along the way: the sky, some trees, an anthill, somebody’s split fence… Zack suddenly noticed a stop sign up ahead. He squinted, wondering why deja vu was washing over him. And then it hit him: it was… that four-way. Yes, the very intersection where he could have died an hour ago. He crept forward, pausing at the edge of the block to survey the road. He recalled hearing Jack squeal his tires, but there were no tire marks on the asphalt. Maybe it hadn’t been that bad of a narrow miss then; Jack had a tendency to make a scene sometimes even when nothing big was happening. Shrugging, Zack turned the corner and held up his camera again. Losing himself in random thoughts, he walked until he wound up by a 7-Eleven that was a considerable distance away from Jack’s house. Zack shook himself out of his reverie, realizing that he’d passed at least two neighbourhoods. Although he enjoyed adventuring around like this, he reluctantly figured that he should return to his friends because who knew what kind of shenanigans they had gotten into in his absence? He wished Rian would hurry over from band so this _responsibility_ could be lifted from his shoulders; Rian didn’t play around and could quickly put a leash on Jack.

Zack stepped into the 7-Eleven; he hadn’t had dinner before Jack had picked him up and also knew that there was going to be nothing to eat at some party in the countryside. He wandered around the store, selecting snacks for not only himself, but for his friends as well. If _he_ hadn’t eaten dinner, _they_ most likely hadn’t, either. He tried to choose food that he thought they would both like and need: Freezies, a carton of chocolate milk, taquitos, a bag of chips plus an ice cream cone for himself; lots of sugary stuff to maintain their energy for the party. The cashier gave him a strange look while ringing up his order, although Zack didn’t understand why when other kids from school had bought weirder assortments of food. He quickly thanked the cashier afterwards and left the store, ready to return to his friends.

***

“You good now?” Jack heard Alex ask.

Jack was more than “good” right now. Nothing beat sitting around holding hands with his best friend who was also his secret crush. Alex’s hand had grown sweaty in his, but Jack didn’t care. “Almost,” he lied.

“Let me know when you want to stop.” Alex gave his hand a reassuring squeeze.

“Okay.” Jack vowed to never speak again if it meant that Alex would hold his hand for the rest of the night.

“Should we call Rian over?” Alex said now, a hint of worry in his voice as he glanced over at Rian’s car. “He looks kind of lonely.”

“I think he’s sleeping,” Jack said without even looking Rian’s way. “Let’s not bother him.” Jack was aware that he was being childish and selfish, but he simply did not give a fuck. Alex would never hold his hand like this at school and their other friends rarely let them have an opportunity to be alone.

Although Rian hadn’t heard what Jack had said, he was, in fact, actually liking this alone time. He’d managed to finish reading a couple of acts in _Hamlet_ and was currently enjoying the newspaper with the rock station gently playing in the background.

***

Zack realized that he was fucked the moment he crossed the 7-Eleven parking lot: he had absolutely no idea how to get back to Jack’s car. Where _was_ Jack’s car even?? One neighbourhood away? Two? Had he come from the north or the west? The south or the east? Although Zack had driven through this area before, he had never bothered to memorize any landmarks; there had been no need to when he’d always relied on his GPS. Wait… GPS… hooking the plastic bag of goodies in one arm while balancing his ice cream cone, he used his free hand to fish out his phone from his pocket and open Google Maps. He let the app lead the way as he periodically gazed around at the sights surrounding him (The scenery here wasn’t any more impressive than in Jack’s area). After about half an hour of walking, he stopped by some random park and sat down at the swings with a mostly-eaten Nestle Drumstick in hand. He considered asking Jack to drive over and get him, but then realized a moment later that many parks in the city had swingsets as well as lots of trees, and that his message would be too vague. This would have been less of a problem had Rian been the one driving instead because Rian had a better sense of direction than Jack did. Zack acknowledged that both he and Jack were not masters of direction.

As he finished his cone, he spotted a little girl racing over to where he was. Because he wasn’t an asshole, he gave up his swing for her… only for her to ask him to push her on the swing. A few seconds later, her mother arrived and apologized to Zack twice. Zack assured her that all was fine before making his way over to a bench nearby. Plopping down, he began calculating how long it’d take for him to reach Jack’s car while staring out at the creek in the distance.

***

Alex was talking about… something school-related. Jack wasn’t really listening, only paying attention to the sound of Alex’s voice with his eyes half-closed. He didn’t care about Danny wiping out in the hallway after school last week; he just liked hearing Alex speak. He tightened his grip on Alex’s hand as the other changed the subject:

“Dude, did you know some chick put a love note in my locker yesterday?”

Jack felt his heart stop beating and his eyes fly open.

“I didn’t bring it, but it was super fucking cheesy. Guess she tried, though.”

“What did it say?” Jack asked quietly, his hand suddenly more clammy than Alex’s, his body more sweaty than when he was in gym class.

“Something along the lines of ‘You have really pretty eyes and a good heart. You’re beautiful.’. Cliche, right?”

“Yeah,” Jack said, then immediately blurted out, “It was me.” His face was burning hotter than, well, the recipient of his “love letter”.

“What? It doesn’t look like your writing, though. You joking here?” Alex shifted to look at Jack, but only saw the back of his head.

“Yeah… I guess,” Jack mumbled, eyeing the cracked pavement of the sidewalk. He couldn’t do it. “I wrote one for all of you guys,” he added in a clearer voice, reaching over to draw his phone from his back pocket. His hand conveniently brushed Alex’s ass in the process.

“What the fuck, why?” Alex couldn’t hold in his snicker. This was probably the worst of Jack’s pranks… and he’d seen some really shitty ones.

“Just wanted to fuck around with you guys,” Jack unlocked his phone and passed it to Alex. “I took pictures of some of them. You can look if you want.” No, Jack hadn’t thought this far; he’d only taken photos of the notes for a good laugh in the future. However, they were saving him right now. “It’s the first few ones.”

“Oh. Okay.” Alex didn’t recognize Jack’s wallpaper: it was a group photo taken in front of… Flyzik’s pool, it seemed like. A pang of jealousy struck him until he realized that Rian wasn’t in the picture either.

Antsy, Jack started babbling, “That’s why Flyzik was chasing me by the vending machines at lunch yesterday.” The real reason Flyzik had hunted him down: he’d run off with the other guy’s social studies review booklet. What? He had better things to do in life than finish some dumb five-page long review booklet. Flyzik actually hadn’t given two shits about Jack’s joke letter; he’d just stood over the recycling bin in their social studies classroom and had shredded up the note.

“Why? What’d you write him--” Alex shut up as his gaze fell on the first image in Jack’s photo gallery. “Dude, what the fuck? _Hey baby, let me come play in ur clubhouse sometime_? With a winky face?”

Jack now wished that he’d actually died at that intersection earlier. “Don’t read them out loud,” he whined, holding Alex’s hand in a death-grip, his face roasting, his eyes flicking over to Rian’s car. Good, Rian was still being a goody two shoes and reading the newspaper.

Alex couldn’t help himself as he flipped through the next few poorly-shot pictures: “ _Vinny u make my head spinny.”_ He burst out laughing. “ _Stop pounding on those drums and let me pound u instead.”_ Alex tried to jerk his hand away from Jack’s. “Ow, stop, it hurts. Wait… _Ur arms are big but are they as big as ur dick?_ Jack, what the actual fuck.”

Jack had loosened his grip, his free hand cradling his head. “Stop, they’re fucking stupid, okay?”

“No, actually, they’re funny.” Alex prodded Jack’s shoulder with the other’s phone. “When did you write all this?”

Jack took his phone back, suddenly a bit more relieved. “In bio yesterday.”

“What? I didn’t see that.” Alex ran through what he could remember from yesterday’s biology class; unfortunately, his only memories consisted of using a Shrinky-Dink oven and Jack wearing _his_ hoodie.

“You were in the back making Shrinky-Dinks with Lisa, Nano, and Zack.” Jack had also entered reminiscing mode, his heart warm as he recalled wearing Alex’s hoodie for the whole class. Alex had taken it off right at the beginning of class and Jack had instantly pounced on the opportunity. _I’m cold,_ he’d complained. _Can I wear that if you’re not?_ Alex had given him a confused look. _It’s hot in here, though,_ he’d said. _That’s why I took it off. Are you feeling okay?_ But then he’d just tossed the hoodie Jack’s way because he had to give Lisa the “bedroom eyes” like he did at least once every time they were in that class.

“Were you making them then?”

“Yeah.” As soon as Alex had gone to the back table with Lisa and Zack, Jack had spent a solid minute sniffing the sleeve of the hoodie because damn, had it smelled _fine._ Then he’d begun writing notes. The “love” notes, not the lecture notes.

“How come the writing for mine looked different?” Alex questioned, furrowing his brows. “And why didn’t I get a stupid joke too?”

Jack had known this would come. “‘Cause yours was the first one,” he replied, still surprising himself with how level his voice was. “Writing like that was tiring.”

“Where was my dirty joke, Jack?” Alex teased.

“Okay, okay! I’ll write you a new one on Monday with a dirty joke,” Jack promised, unable to stop a goofy smile from stretching across his face. Alex wasn’t offended… that was good.

The two lapsed into silence then, their hands still entwined. Alex was studying the reddening sky; the sun would set soon and he’d be able to show Jack some of the constellations he’d listed earlier. Jack had his eyes on his house but wasn’t seeing anything. His mouth had gone dry and his body had frozen up despite his racing heart and thoughts. Talking about his stupid fake (minus one) love letters was a nice opening to lead into what he now wanted to say… but did Alex really want to hear it? Right now? While he was high?

It was obvious that Alex liked Lisa. Jack had to painfully witness him try to flirt with Lisa every bio class or call out to her in the cafeteria at lunchtime sometimes to ask her to come sit at their table. The guy excelled at school, but his subtlety needed some working-on. He also got an F in just being direct and asking her out. Then there was Rian, who had a thing for this girl named Cassadee. Cass had been a fun girl back when she had still been at their school; the day she moved had been the saddest day in Rian’s life other than the time Jack had eaten his share of his mother’s cookies. However, similar to how he never failed to show up to his classes, Rian also never failed to keep in touch with Cass. On the other hand, Zack was in love with ketchup. Or his hand. Nobody knew who he actually had a crush on; Jack could count all his unsuccessful attempts at forcing an answer out of Zack’s mouth.

High school crushes were a stupid shitshow. But Jack only thought that because he was going for someone who wasn’t an option. Alex was straight… and also too out of his league. No scholarship-bound, high honour roll student would stoop so low to date the troublemaking class clown.

“Jack?” Alex said softly after a while, lightly squeezing Jack’s hand. “Are you okay?”

“Not really,” Jack said out loud, his eyes widening when he realized that he’d spoken it aloud.

“What is it?” Alex asked worriedly.

“Can I tell you something?” It didn’t matter anymore what Jack said or did; he was screwed either way. Besides, Alex was probably stoned as hell at the moment and likely wouldn’t remember all this tomorrow.  However, he was still unable to calm himself down, his shirt clinging to his damp back. This was crappy; he liked this shirt but now it was gross and they hadn’t even arrived at the party yet.

“Yeah?”

His heart was pounding in his ears, his face definitely a brighter red than Zack’s bandana. He tried to steady his breathing before saying _those_ words, although he couldn’t bring himself to speak above a murmur: “I like you, okay?”

“Okay? I like you too?” Alex was baffled. What did Jack want from him? His biology worksheet? Why was Jack sucking up to him all of a sudden?

It struck Jack that his words had flown over Alex’s head. Dense fuck… no wonder he and Lisa weren’t together yet! Jack could imagine the exchange: _“Hey, Alex, I like you.” “Yeah, I like you too. You’re a great girl.”_

“No, I really like you,” Jack said in a louder voice, albeit still slightly shakily. He wasn’t as nervous anymore. How could he be when he’d gotten _that_ kind of response?

“Jack, we’re best friends. Why would you be friends with someone you hate? Now, what do you _really_ want? Did you not finish that bio worksheet or something?”

“Alex, I-” Jack stopped. Alex’s brain was still in school-mode, for fuck’s sake. “No, it’s like… like…” Jack began wildly gesturing with his free hand. How could he connect this with _school_ to make Alex understand? “Like… you know… that… that thing. You know?”

Alex shook his head. “Jack, I’m not following you here.”

“It’s like that thing with Lisa,” Jack finally managed. “You know how you get around Lisa? It’s like _that.”_

“What does Lisa have to do with anything?” Alex frowned.

“I don’t know.”

“Dude, you’re so high right now,” Alex chuckled.

“I know,” Jack said, because he _was_ high but also now feeling low. Alex didn’t get it. Or maybe he had but was fucking around with him as revenge for that stupid letter. Jack regretted writing that shitty note. He tightened his grip on Alex’s hand. “Alex, I love you,” he said in the most solemn tone he could muster because he was serious and wished to be taken as such.

Alex laughed; Jack felt his heart drop.

“You’re so, so high. I love you too, man. Thanks for being my best friend.”

It was in that moment that Zack decided to intervene; the secondhand embarrassment had become too much. He’d returned in time to hear Jack’s confession, but had chosen to stay away and hide behind a tree in the front yard of Jack’s neighbour out of respect. Unfortunately, he had heard everything and now pitied Jack. He set down the plastic bag that he’d been carrying by Jack’s feet and waved.

Jack glanced down at the bag of goodies, but said nothing.

Zack gave him an apologetic pat on the arm before approaching Alex, whose eyes lit up at the sight of him.

“Hey! Welcome back!” Alex raised his hand in a greeting.

“I brought you guys some food,” Zack said, motioning in Jack’s direction. “I left it by Jack.”

“Really? Thanks, man!” Alex clapped Zack’s shoulder. “Wanna come join us?”

“Nah. I’m good.” Even if Jack hadn’t gotten his heart unintentionally broken, Zack would have still refused. He didn’t need Rian’s level of intelligence to correctly guess that there was no room for three 6 ft.+ guys on top of the car. “I’ll just keep Rian company,” he added after seeing Alex’s bright expression fall. And with that, he calmly (because he didn’t want Jack to figure anything out) strode over to Rian’s car, tapping on the passenger side window to be let in.

Rian jumped at the small knock, setting the newspaper down and whipping his head around. He relaxed when he noticed that it was just Zack peering inside, waving. “Hey,” he said after he’d unlocked the door and Zack had come in.

“Hey,” Zack replied, picking up Rian’s backpack and moving it to the backseat.

“So… are they dating now or..?” Rian jerked his chin their friends’ way. He’d received an interesting message from Zack about 10 minutes ago:

_I think jack’s trying to ask alex out lol_

Normally, Rian preferred to mind his own business… well, actually, his friends _were_ his business. He’d hopefully rolled down the window halfway after he’d read Zack’s text. However, he’d been too far away and had only heard Alex laughing and telling Jack that he was baked.

Zack shook his head. “Alex is too high to understand what Jack really means.”

“Shit. That’s too bad,” Rian frowned, eyeing the duo on the car. “I’m sorry to hear that.” He truly was. Jack’s crush on Alex had been obvious, even if Jack himself had never admitted it out loud. Rian wasn’t stupid: he’d seen how Jack had looked at Alex last year in psychology class. He’d believed that he’d been reading into it too much at first; the two had been best friends since middle school so it had made sense to Rian that Jack would stare at Alex fondly sometimes. What confirmed his suspicion was when he’d caught sight of Jack playing with Alex’s hair instead of reading the textbook. After that, Rian had started seeing hints everywhere from time to time: Jack sitting pressed against Alex on the gym bleachers although there was a fair bit of space beside him, begging Alex for a piggyback ride even though he was the taller one, randomly yelling _I love you_ to Alex from the other end of the hallway… the clues were present to an observant eye, but subtle otherwise (Zack had never noticed anything until Rian had mentioned it to him).

Rian then moved his gaze away to follow Zack’s. “Yeah, it’s the newspaper. Do you want it?”

“I think this one is _dick,”_ Zack said, pointing to 69-Across of the daily crossword puzzle in the newspaper. “What else is four letters and ends with _ck_?”

Rian narrowed his eyes, assessing the four-letter answer slot. “You can’t be too sure. It could be _cock.”_

They began working on the crossword puzzle together as Alex swirled the chocolate milk in the carton that he was holding. “Dude,” he said, gazing at Rian’s car, “maybe we should join them. They look like they’re doing something in there.”

“Homework, probably,” Jack said flatly, absently sucking on the melted freezie that Zack had bought. “It’s Rian. He’s probably forcing Zack to do homework with him.”

“Maybe he’ll help us with ours,” Alex teased, oblivious to Jack’s change in mood.

“Then go over there, suck his dick, and get that A,” Jack couldn’t stop himself from snapping. Not only had Alex friendzoned him to oblivion, but the guy had also quit holding his hand to dig through the bag of offerings that Zack had brought.

“Maybe Zack will let you suck his for help too,” Alex continued joking, nudging Jack with his elbow.

“Hey, aren’t _you_ on honour roll? Why can’t I suck _your_ dick, then?” Jack had nothing left to lose considering Alex wasn’t taking anything that he said tonight seriously.

“I don’t know,” Alex shook his head. “You might choke. Choking hazard, you know?”

“I didn’t think a guy like you would have a big dick anyway,” Jack shot back halfheartedly. He was still hurt about being rejected, but wasn’t as angry anymore; he shouldn’t have confessed while Alex was high to begin with.

Alex opened his mouth to counter with a witty comeback of his own when he was interrupted by Rian’s shout:

“Hey!”

Both he and Jack turned at the same time. Rian was standing in the middle of the road with his hands in his pockets. Jack stuck his tongue out at him. Ignoring Jack’s blue tongue, Rian went on:

“Zack said they’re getting close to picking a location, so the convoy will be in an hour. Why don’t you guys come join us in my car so we can just go when they’re ready?”

Alex exchanged glances with Jack, who frowned. However, he couldn’t help but grin. Finally, his night could begin. “Sounds good. Let’s go.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is the answer to 69-Across of the crossword puzzle _dick_ or _cock_? Will Alex ever notice Jack? Are they ever going to get to the party? We'll never know :) as always, thank you so much for reading and see you all in the next chapter! Take care, everyone.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, thanks for checking out this story! It's probably gonna be exactly what you'd expect LOL. Anyway, thank you for reading and see y'all in the next chapter!


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